Let's all pretend that the following things don't exist, OK?

Low-riding pants
The Family Circus
Supermodels
Right-wing blogs
Reality TV
American Girl dolls
Lindsay Lohan
Crosses worn for fashion
Mormons
MTV
Anne Coulter
Thongs
Dakota Fanning
Supermodels
Fox News
Jenny McCarthy
Harley-Davidson motorcycles
Britney Spears
The vital centre
That girl who says "That's hot!"
Grunge rock
Visible underwear
Shania Twain
Rock the Vote
Disney Princess stuff
Madonna
Lads' magazines
TomKat
Anything advertised in ROLLING STONE magazine
ROLLING STONE magazine itself
Brangelina
Gangsta rap
Hillary Clinton
THE NEW YORK TIMES
Jessica Simpson
Patriotic fashions
Clubbing
The middle class